


saints into the sea

by dayatiny



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Angst, Eventual Smut, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, Jeong Yunho and Song Mingi are Best Friends, M/M, Minor Original Character, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Jeong Yunho, Oblivious Song Mingi, Pining, Requited Unrequited Love, Song Mingi is Sad, Unrequited Love, will update tags as I go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-14
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-11-17 22:11:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18107498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dayatiny/pseuds/dayatiny
Summary: Mingi doesn’t like the wordjealous. He doesn’t like the word jealous because when he hears the word jealous he thinks of angry men with insecurities, or a little green monster, or how his mother described his childhood bullies even though she and Mingi both knew better. He likes the wordpossessiveeven less; the implication of ownership and the hissy tone of it sitting acrid on his tongue.





	saints into the sea

**Author's Note:**

> i do not know why i give the name minwoo to any male plot device minor character please do not question me

Mingi doesn’t like the word _jealous_. He doesn’t like the word jealous because when he hears the word jealous he thinks of angry men with insecurities, or a little green monster, or how his mother described his childhood bullies as even though she and Mingi both knew better. He likes the word _possessive_ even less; the implication of ownership and the hissy tone of it sitting acrid on his tongue. 

And yet no other words come to mind to describe the deep, hurt feeling in his chest when Yunho brings _him_ home for the first time. 

It was exactly two years and a month after Mingi and Yunho signed the lease on their humble little flat that Yunho, for the first time in all of the years Mingi had known him, got into a relationship. Mingi knows that’s how long it had been because Yunho was insistent about little details like that, liked to celebrate each passing year of their - in his own words - _platonic life partnership slash soulmatehood slash eternal friendship_ with a nice dinner or flowers or some oddly sweet gesture or other. 

Mingi made fun of him relentlessly for it, of course, but Yunho never stopped.

Their cohabitative gig was great like that. Mingi would cook and Yunho would take care of the dishes. Mingi would shake Yunho awake when he ignored his alarm clock most mornings and Yunho would pull Mingi away from his work and make sure he got to sleep at a reasonable time most nights. Yunho’s clothes fit Mingi and vice versa, a fact that Mingi took gleeful, frequent advantage of. 

Their friend group could mock-gag and tease all they wanted about the pure domesticity of it all, but Mingi and Yunho had a pretty good setup going. Or, Mingi had thought they did. 

Then Jeong Yunho, his roommate, favorite person, and the best friend Mingi had been in love with for _years_ brought a guy home.

______________________

When Yunho came home that Thursday night, he brought with him two bags of Chinese takeout from their usual place across from the convenience store, and a man. Both were an issue.

Mingi called out a a greeting from the kitchen, confusedly, when Yunho’s usual holler of “ _HONEY, i’m HOME!_ ” failed to resound throughout the house. Shrugging, Mingi put the finishing touches on his lasagna and pushed it into the oven. When he turned around, Yunho was standing in the entryway of the kitchen, arm around the shoulders of a handsome, shorter man with dark brown hair. Mingi had never seen the guy before in his life.

“Hey! Mingi, is it alright if Minwoo joins us for dinner?” Yunho asked, smiling widely but strained at the corners in the way that Mingi knew meant Yunho was feeling awkward. Mingi’s brow furrowed.

“Who’s Minwoo?” Mingi blurts, without thought, before his eyes trained themselves once again on the stranger in their kitchen and the arm around his shoulders. The man in question waved, once, uncertainly.

“Yunho’s never talked about me?” ‘Minwoo’ questioned. His voice was a clear tenor. He jabbed Yunho in the side and scowled at him, jokingly. “What kind of boyfriend are you?”

Mingi felt abruptly sick. 

“I was just waiting to introduce you both properly!” Yunho protested. “Mingi, this is my boyfriend, Minwoo,” he rushed to explain. “And this is Mingi, he’s my, uh, roommate.”

There are a million and one things Mingi wants to say at that moment. He wants to ask how long this has been going on, and why Yunho didn’t tell him, and if it’s because he doesn’t trust Mingi anymore. Because this is a _big thing_ , the kind of big thing you don’t keep secret from your best friend. He wants to ask why Yunho needs a boyfriend when Mingi is _right here_. He wants to ask what he can do to make Yunho want him back. But Mingi isn’t entitled, he’s not possessive, he’s not _jealous._

“You shouldn’t have bought takeout. I already made my five-cheese lasagna,” he exclaimed instead, hoping his grin doesn’t look as fake as it is. Every second Thursday was lasagna night. Yunho knew this.

“Minwoo is lactose intolerant,” Yunho explained, and the man beside him smiles apologetically at Mingi. _I’m **you** -intolerant,_ Mingi thinks, pettily.

“Oh.” A pregnant pause fills the room. Yunho is looking at Mingi. Mingi is looking at the takeout bags. “That’s okay.”

It’s not.

\------------

 

Mingi met Yunho in college. They were in the same department, had taken multiple classes together, even shared some of the same friends. But it wasn’t until third year that they had even really spoken, always just-missing each other. 

Hongjoong had introduced them, actually. Finals were just a little while off, and Hongjoong had arranged a study group with Mingi and a couple other classmates. They met on the second floor of the library, in the foreign lit corner, and Mingi was the only one who consistently showed up to study group. That had less to do with Mingi’s passion for academia and more to do with how _Hongjoong_ was the host.

Mingi had nursed a world-endingly huge crush on him for practically the entirety of their acquaintance. Mingi can look back on it and laugh, now, but he plans to take that particular secret with him to the grave.

Sometimes he thinks Hongjoong had to have known - it’s not like Mingi was subtle in his affections. He doggedly pursued any and all chances to spend time with the older boy, complimented him incessantly, always greeted him with a cup of coffee or his favorite snacks. He pined after him for most of university and did just about everything but actually confess. 

He’s grateful he didn’t - they’ve remained great friends. But he wonders sometimes.

It was on one of those - in his eyes - _romantic_ study-group days that Hongjoong had invited Jeong Yunho along. 

“My name’s Yunho. We worked on that project together in Professor Lee’s class last month?” He had asked, head tilted to the side as Mingi wracked his brain. His arm stretched across the table to offer Mingi a handshake. Mingi remembers thinking it was oddly formal, but complying. Yunho’s hands were bigger than his own by a smidge, with strong wrists and long pretty fingers. Mingi thought to himself that Yunho could probably make money being a hand model.

“You make really nice powerpoints,” he added, with a sunny smile.

“Thanks! I like your jacket!” Mingi rushed to return the compliment, puzzled by his lack of recollection. Even back then, Yunho was stunning - gorgeous in that wholesome way, with a presence that filled the room. Mingi wasn’t sure how he could’ve missed someone like that. 

Hongjoong watched them make painful small-talk for a while longer before thankfully reigning them in to study.

Their session went as it always did, despite the addition to the group - which is to say they worked diligently for about an hour before getting off an a tangent. In the middle of an animated discussion about the merits of pineapple pizza - in which Yunho and Hongjoong ganged up on him for preferring it mercilessly - Mingi’s empty stomach decided to announce itself. A student a table away _shhh_ ’d in their direction. Mingi sunk into his seat in shame.

“I can go on a snack run real quick,” Yunho offered. Mingi looked up at him like he just saw God. 

“Dude, i’ll give you my firstborn.” Hongjoong said, solemnly, reaching his arms out to the ceiling as he stretched. Mingi stared longingly at the pretty curve of his back. “Mingi, go with him? So you can show him the good vending machines.”

Mingi glanced between Yunho and Hongjoong, conflicted. His heart wanted alone time with Hongjoong - Yunho was nice and all...but his presence was still intruding on _their time_. But his stomach wanted to accompany Yunho. And Hongjoong had _told_ him to go with Yunho.

Mingi rose from his seat, somewhat grudgingly. He couldn’t be too put-out, though - not with Hongjoong flashing him a happy smile. Mingi waved shyly. 

Yunho rested his hand in a loop on Mingi’s backpack and began walking. Mingi wouldn’t say he was acting too-familiar, but it was unexpectedly friendly. Just a tad removed from slinging an arm over his shoulder. But Mingi didn’t say anything about it. 

He tried to think of something to talk about, now that Hongjoong wasn’t there to serve as a buffer for awkwardness. 

“Do you not know where the vending machines are because you don’t come to the library often?” He asked, innocently enough. He smiled at Yunho.

Yunho flushed, and Mingi realized belatedly his question sounded kind of rude. Before he could correct himself, Yunho rushed to explain.

“I come here a ton! I study a lot, just not usually on this floor. Trust me, I care about my grades. You can ask Hongjoong, I’m _always_ in the library.” he rambled. Mingi bit his cheek so he wouldn’t laugh at the defensive tone in Yunho’s voice.

“So you practically live in the library?” Mingi decides to tease, gently knocking Yunho’s shoulder with his as they walked. “Nerd.”

“I mean, I’m not here _that_ often,” Yunho began to backtrack, before he glanced at Mingi’s face and realized he was messing around. “Oh, you dick,” he laughed, shoving him back.

Mingi grinned, thinking to himself that he wouldn’t mind being closer friends with Yunho.

Except. 

Yunho kept coming to Mingi and Hongjoong’s study sessions. And it wasn’t just that - but over the weeks Mingi began to develop a sneaking suspicion that Yunho, too, was vying for Hongjoong’s affections.

It started with little things. Little things like Yunho taking the seat across the table from Mingi - _Hongjoong’s seat_ \- when the eldest boy was late(which he was increasingly often after Yunho started tagging along for their sessions). When Hongjoong would finally arrive, he’d sit down next to Mingi, and Mingi would despair because that meant he couldn’t sneak glances at the elder while he studied as often without being obvious. 

Even worse; occasionally, Mingi would feel watched, only to glance up and see that instead Yunho’s eyes were trained on a bookshelf or wall-clock. This was especially heinous because it was never an object that warranted Yunho’s wide-eyed stares - and it became quickly obvious that whenever Mingi looked up Yunho had directed his eyes elsewhere. He realized with great horror that Yunho sat across from them so he could admire Hongjoong _the same way Mingi did._

Another thing that came to infuriate him was Yunho was buying him things. The taller boy would ply Mingi with sweets and snacks, right in front of Hongjoong. At first, Mingi just figured Yunho was nice like that. But after the nth time Mingi offhandedly mentioned a food and Yunho immediately offered to go purchase it before sharing a secret little smile with Hongjoong, he began to subscribe more to a different idea.

It was genius really - Yunho was showing off to Hongjoong how kind and generous he was, without making his crush obvious by buying things for Hongjoong directly.

Mingi thought about refusing the snacks, on principle.

He still ate them. As a starving college student, Mingi would be the first to admit his hunger was stronger than his principles. 

But the cherry on top of the growing-apprehension-over-a-potential-love-rival ice cream cone was how Hongjoong _bought into it all._ Even during precious moments of respite from Jeong Yunho’s reign of terror, Mingi couldn’t be truly free of him.

“Why did the coffee have to file a police report?” Hongjoong began, latte foam smeared on his upper lip. Mingi wanted to lick it off. But that would be inappropriate in a cafe setting and also Hongjoong would kick his ass. _Bet he wouldn’t kick Yunho’s ass,_ he thought, sulkily.

“Because….he was grounded...no, because he’d… _bean_ assaulted? Because…” Mingi hummed, tapping his fingers against the table in thought. “I dunno.” he concedes, smiling indulgently - helplessly.

“Because he got _mugged_!” Hongjoong exclaimed, raising his cup for emphasis. Mingi snorted, unable to control his laughter.

“That was really bad!”

“But you still laughed, so.” Hongjoong waggled his eyebrows. “Actually, Yunho told me that one.”

Mingi’s giggles died in his throat. “Oh, yeah?” He tried to sound less sullen than he felt.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong said, oblivious. “He’s really funny, actually. One of the funniest guys I know.”

Hongjoong always snuck little tidbits like that into their conversations. About how Yunho was so tall, and how he played sports for the university, and always smelled good and once got approached for modelling off the street. 

What smarted even more was that Hongjoong wasn’t wrong. Yunho had gorgeous eyes, he was a great listener, and was talented when it came to literally everything. Mingi couldn’t even blame Hongjoong for liking him better. 

Mingi liked Yunho more than he liked himself, too. But that wasn’t saying much.

“So, Mingi,” Hongjoong had clapped him on the back on their way back to the dorms. Mingi’s hot chocolate was cold in his hand. “Is there anyone you like right now?”

Mingi’s heart had all but dropped into his stomach. He stumbled over some invisible obstacle, forgetting how to walk for the time being. He splashed his drink onto his favorite sweater. The first time he ever wore it, Hongjoong complimented that sweater; said it made Mingi look handsome. It became a staple in his wardrobe unsurprisingly quickly.

“Fuck!” Mingi yelped, expecting the drink to be hot on impact. He blinked down at the stain. “Oh. Jesus fuck that was anticlimactic.”

Hongjoong was looking at him like he was trying not to laugh, saying nothing. 

“Sorry,” Mingi apologized, nonsensically. Hongjoong reached out and patted Mingi’s cheek, consolingly. 

“Mingi, you’re lucky you’re cute.” Hongjoong said, with solemnness. He took the disposable cup from Mingi’s hand and made for the nearby garbage. Mingi reached up to feel if his face was really as hot as it felt. It was.

Mingi felt an odd confidence. Later, once he’d processed what Hongjoong had said completely, he’d squeal into his pillow and replay the moment in his head till it lost its butterflies-inducing effect. But now, he needed to know why Hongjoong asked _that_.

He opened his mouth to say something ideally suave, but Hongjoong beat him to it.

“Yunho likes someone, you know,” Hongjoong said, faux-casually. Then he broke out in a big, beaming smile, jostling Mingi with his pointy elbow. “I swear it’s true, he told me himself.” he added, like Mingi was disbelieving.

Mingi felt a dull pang in his chest. He kicked dejectedly at a rock in his path as they walked. His favorite sweater was stained and he had wasted $3.50 on a hot chocolate and he felt like a complete clown for even entertaining the thought that Hongjoong might finally like him back.

“Ah, that’s cool,” Mingi replied, tonelessly.

He wondered, later, if Hongjoong was trying to get him to take a hint. He banished the thought. Hongjoong wasn’t that type of person. He was straightforward and kind and painfully, painfully unaware of Mingi’s crippling infatuation. And Mingi wasn’t going to change that. 

So for the rest of that year, Mingi was haunted by Jeong Yunho.  
__________________________

A lot happened between Mingi and Yunho’s collision in third year and their current living situation. And Mingi wouldn’t change it for the world. But he can’t deny they had, from his perspective, a god-awful beginning.

Nothing like Yunho and _Minwoo_ ’s first meeting.

“And he was so cute,” Minwoo recounts fondly, gesturing with his fork as he tells the story of how he met Yunho in highschool. The three of them are crowded around Mingi and Yunho’s bitty dining room table.

Mingi can hear the news channel blathering on from their living room and the clink of Yunho’s fork on his plate and a buzzing in his skull that feels like the beginning of a migraine. 

Mingi seethes over how he only met Yunho well into college. Yunho would have been the cutest kid.

“I had to help him get to his homeroom every day for a _month._ You know how bad he is with directions,” Minwoo shares a conspiratorial grin with Mingi. _I **do** know,_ Mingi wants to say.

“He was the gangliest thing, and his bowl cut - “

“You had _frosted tips_ , to be fair.” Yunho interrupts, pouting down at the shorter man. He bickers with Minwoo playfully for a few minutes, and Mingi tunes out.

Yunho hadn't spoken much to him since his little declaration, sneaking glances at Mingi intermittently throughout dinner like he was gauging his reaction. Mingi knew, from experience, that he was feeling hesitant - anxious about something. He must've wanted approval, for Mingi to welcome Minwoo with open arms. But Mingi couldn’t bring himself to muster up the courage to act like he was happy for Yunho.

And maybe a selfish part of him wanted Yunho to worry a bit; wanted Yunho to wonder over him. Maybe he’d finally wise up and realize Mingi had been pining over him for _two and a half years._

Mingi stared morosely into his five-cheese lasagna. He wished it would speak to him. Maybe it would have some answers as to how he’s supposed to pretend to be happy that the love of his life is in love with someone else. 

Yunho’s plate is loaded with Chinese takeout.

**Author's Note:**

> university mingi was....oblivious  
> I hope you enjoyed the first chapter!! If you could drop a kudos or a comment if you're SUPER kind I would love that!!  
> This'll probably only be a few chapters long because it was initially intended to be a one shot but;; so much to write about oof  
> also you can contact me on twitter @dayatiny if you wanna  
> also I will update smatib....soon.....soon  
> please tell me your thoughts!! <3 thanks for reading


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